His Parting from Her by John Donne (Poem, Summary, Paraphrase, Analysis & Questions)

 

His Parting from Her

by John Donne

(Poem, Summary, Paraphrase, Analysis & Questions) 

His Parting from Her

Since she must go, and I must mourn, come night,

Environ me with darkness, whilst I write:

Shadow that hell unto me, which alone

I am to suffer when my love is gone.

Alas! the darkest magic cannot do it,

Thou and great hell to boot are shadows to it.

Stay, O sweet time; for ever stay: delay

Thy wings, oh, do not rise the yet loud day!

Alas! the joys that fortune brings are gone;

But not the griefs that they with them have done.

Alas! my faith is lost: my hope, and all

Are flown, but with her love occasional.

Time can have nothing more; she cannot go,

It was my heart she took; away it flew.

How poor am I now, my joy, my wealth, my treasure,

My heart, my fancy, and my soul, my pleasure!

Who ever goes, goes with her: oh, bright day,

Go, froward sun, and bring again the night!

That her tall shadows may by that still be

The shadows of my body, or of me.

 

Summary

Opening Grief

The speaker begins by acknowledging that his beloved must leave, and that he must stay behind in sorrow. As he prepares to write in this moment of pain, he calls upon the night to surround him in darkness, because her departure feels like a descent into his own personal hell.

 

Darkness as a Symbol of Pain

He asks the night to imitate the torment he feels, but quickly admits that even the blackness of night and hell combined cannot match the depth of his suffering. His emotional anguish surpasses even the darkest of things.

 

Plea to Time

The speaker pleads with time to stop, to freeze the moment so that the day will not arrive and force their separation. He wants to delay the sunrise because the day will make her departure real and final.

 

Loss of Fortune and Faith

He laments that the happiness brought by fortune (or fate) has vanished with her, but the sorrow remains. He declares that he has lost his faith and hope, which only existed when her love was present.

 

His Heart Has Gone with Her

Time can take nothing more from him, he says, because when she left, she took his heart with her. In essence, she carries the most vital part of him.

 

Complete Emotional Poverty

The speaker lists everything he has lost with her departure: joy, wealth, treasure, heart, imagination, soul, and pleasure. These were all embodied in her, and now that she is gone, so are they.

 

No One Left Behind

He claims that whoever leaves with her (perhaps servants, companions, etc.) is not really leaving anyone behind, because he himself is nothing now — his true self has gone with her.

 

Final Appeal to Night

In closing, the speaker urges the sun to go away and bring back the night. He desires the return of shadows, because in the darkness, he can at least pretend her shadow remains — either beside his body or as part of himself.

 

Line-by-line Paraphrase

1. Since she must go, and I must mourn, come night,

→ Since she has to leave and I must grieve, let night come now,

 

2. Environ me with darkness, whilst I write:

→ Surround me with darkness while I write these words.

 

3. Shadow that hell unto me, which alone

→ Cast a shadow that reflects the hell I alone must suffer,

 

4. I am to suffer when my love is gone.

→ The hell I will go through when my beloved is gone.

 

5. Alas! the darkest magic cannot do it,

→ Sadly, even the darkest magic can’t truly recreate this pain,

 

6. Thou and great hell to boot are shadows to it.

→ You (night) and even hell itself are only weak imitations of my sorrow.

 

7. Stay, O sweet time; for ever stay: delay

→ Stop, sweet time — please stay forever, delay everything!

 

8. Thy wings, oh, do not rise the yet loud day!

→ Don’t let the wings of time bring forth the noisy, dawning day!

 

9. Alas! the joys that fortune brings are gone;

→ Alas, all the happiness that fate once gave me is now gone,

 

10. But not the griefs that they with them have done.

→ But the grief that came along with it still remains.

 

11. Alas! my faith is lost: my hope, and all

→ I’ve lost my faith, my hope, and everything else too.

 

12. Are flown, but with her love occasional.

→ They’ve all disappeared — they only existed when her love was near.

 

13. Time can have nothing more; she cannot go,

→ Time can’t take anything more from me; she can’t really leave,

 

14. It was my heart she took; away it flew.

→ Because she’s already taken my heart — it went away with her.

 

15. How poor am I now, my joy, my wealth, my treasure,

→ How empty I am now — she was my joy, my riches, my precious one,

 

16. My heart, my fancy, and my soul, my pleasure!

→ She was my heart, imagination, soul — all my happiness.

 

17. Who ever goes, goes with her: oh, bright day,

→ Whoever else is going, goes with her — oh, bright day,

 

18. Go, froward sun, and bring again the night!

→ Go away, stubborn sun — bring the night back!

 

19. That her tall shadows may by that still be

→ So that the tall shadows she casts might still be there,

 

20. The shadows of my body, or of me.

→ Shadows that seem like parts of my body — or even of my soul.

 

Analysis in Detail

John Donne’s “Elegy: His Parting from Her” is a deeply emotional and sensuous poem that captures the intense sorrow of a lover who is being separated from his beloved. The poem moves between expressions of grief, metaphysical reflection, and passionate longing, characteristic of Donne’s poetic style.

 

Theme of Love and Loss

At its core, the poem explores the agony of parting. Donne dramatizes the pain of separation not just as an emotional experience, but as a kind of death, a descent into personal hell. The speaker’s grief is profound and total — he feels that his beloved’s departure strips him of joy, hope, and even his own identity. Love, in Donne’s depiction, is not merely an affection or a bond but the very substance of the soul. When his lover leaves, it’s as if she takes his very heart, mind, and spirit with her.

This highlights a recurring Donne theme: the total immersion of the self in love. For Donne, to love someone is to be so united with them that separation feels like dismemberment.

 

Imagery of Darkness and Hell

Donne employs strong metaphysical and emotional imagery throughout the poem. He invokes night and darkness not just to reflect the time of parting but as symbols of internal despair. Darkness becomes a metaphor for his emotional state — a visual representation of his sorrow. He even compares his grief to hell, emphasizing the spiritual torment he experiences. Yet, he boldly claims that even hell and night are mere shadows compared to the pain he feels.

This hyperbolic expression deepens the poem’s emotional intensity and shows how Donne often stretches poetic conceits to dramatize inner experience.

 

Time as the Enemy

Time is portrayed as a ruthless force, pushing the lovers toward separation. Donne pleads for time to stop, or at least delay its movement: “Stay, O sweet time.” The sun, which usually symbolizes life and warmth, is seen here as a hostile agent, bringing the “loud day” that will tear the lovers apart. This reversal of typical symbolism reflects Donne’s emotional inversion — in grief, the bright day becomes unbearable and night, though dark, becomes a place of refuge.

This also reflects a common motif in Renaissance poetry: the lover’s struggle against time, which often brings decay, change, and separation.

 

Loss of Identity and Self

As the poem progresses, the speaker laments that with the departure of his beloved, he has lost everything: his heart, his joy, his wealth, his soul, and his imagination. She is described not just as a person he loves, but as the source of his entire being and purpose. With her gone, he is reduced to nothingness. There’s a deep sense of emotional and existential emptiness here, portraying how total his attachment to her is.

Such intensity borders on the idea that love is not just life-affirming but life-defining, and without it, existence becomes hollow.

 

Poetic Structure and Language

The poem is written in rhymed couplets, which give it a flowing, almost musical rhythm, but the tone remains somber throughout. The rhyme scheme (AA, BB, etc.) holds the sorrowful lines together in a kind of poetic unity, perhaps reflecting the speaker’s attempt to find order amid emotional chaos.

Donne’s use of enjambment — where one line flows into the next without a pause — adds a sense of urgency and breathless intensity. His sentences often spill over several lines, echoing the speaker’s overwhelmed and unrestrained emotions.

The language combines courtly elegance with raw emotion. While much of it is lofty and metaphorical (“She took my heart; away it flew”), there is also plain anguish beneath the rhetorical flourish.

 

The Metaphysical Element

Donne is a metaphysical poet, and this elegy reflects that in how it blends emotional experience with philosophical and cosmic ideas. Love, time, light, darkness, soul, and identity are all intertwined. His grief is not only emotional but also intellectual — he tries to understand and frame his sorrow in metaphysical terms.

The final lines evoke a strange but poignant image: he wishes the night to return so that the shadows of his beloved — or even just shadows resembling her — might appear and stay with him. This shows the speaker’s descent into illusion and longing, as even the shadow of her presence is preferable to her absence.

 

Tone

The tone of the poem is a blend of:

Desperate sorrow: The speaker’s grief is intense and all-consuming.

Sensual longing: His love is deeply physical and emotional.

Philosophical despair: He meditates on the meaning of selfhood, time, and absence.

Pleading and mournful: He appeals to time, night, and even the sun, trying to control the uncontrollable forces pulling his beloved away.

 

Conclusion

In “Elegy: His Parting from Her”, John Donne portrays the sorrow of romantic separation with unparalleled intensity. Using metaphysical conceits, emotional extremes, and dramatic language, Donne creates a powerful elegy that captures not only a lover’s grief but also the spiritual and existential void that such a loss can bring. The poem is not just a farewell — it is a funeral song for the self, mourning not only the loss of a beloved but the disintegration of the lover's very identity.

 

Possible Exam Questions

Who wrote Elegy: His Parting from Her?

 

What natural time of day does the speaker prefer in the poem?

 

What emotion dominates the speaker’s mood in the poem?

 

Which metaphysical concept is used to describe the lover’s sorrow?

 

What does the speaker claim his beloved has taken with her?

 

Identify the poetic form used in this elegy.

 

What does the speaker ask time to do?

 

Which two symbolic elements are used to express sorrow — mentioned in the lines “Thou and great hell to boot are shadows to it”?

 

What does night symbolize in the poem, and why does the speaker welcome it?

 

How does the speaker describe the pain of separation from his beloved?

 

Explain the meaning of the line: “It was my heart she took; away it flew.”

 

Why does the speaker ask the sun to “bring again the night”?

 

What role does time play in the emotional experience described in the poem?

 

Mention any two metaphors or comparisons used to express grief in the poem.

 

Describe the emotional state of the speaker in Elegy: His Parting from Her. How does Donne express sorrow through imagery and language?

 

Discuss how Donne blends sensuality and metaphysical reflection in this elegy. Give examples from the text.

 

How does the poem Elegy: His Parting from Her reflect the themes of love, loss, and identity?

 

Examine the use of contrasts (day/night, light/dark, presence/absence) in the poem and their significance to the speaker’s condition.

 

John Donne’s poetry often features intense personal emotion expressed through intellectual metaphors. Discuss how this is seen in Elegy: His Parting from Her.