Marriage is a Private Affair by Chinua Achebe (Summary & Analysis)

 

Marriage is

a Private Affair

by Chinua Achebe

(Summary & Analysis) 

 

Born in 1930 Chinua Achebe is one of the most reputed writers of fiction of African Literature. His versatile mind has found expression in diverse spheres of activity. He joined the Nigerian Broadcasting Corporation in 1954 and has worked at the institute of African Studies at Nsukka. He also distinguished himself as a poet. His collection of poems, Beware Soul Brothers, won the commonwealth poetry prize in 1972. Achebe is the central figure in the field of fiction writing. His popular novels are Things Fall Apart (1958), No Longer at Ease (1960), Arrow of God (1964) and A man of the people (1966).

Summary

The story opens in the city of Lagos with Nene and Nnaemeka talking over the issue of their recent engagement. Nene wants him to write a letter to his father and inform him about it but Nnaemeka wants to do it personally when he goes to his village during the vacation because he is sure that his father will not like this news.

Nene has lived in Lagos since her childhood, and so she doesn’t know much about people in remote parts of the country. Nnaemeka is aware of the fact that just like elsewhere, in his village also a person’s tribe determines whom he married that too only with the consent of his parents. He tries to explain things to Nene but she doesn’t understand and leaves it to Nnaemeka.

On his way back, Nnaemeka again reads out the letter he has recently received from his father stating, that he had chosen a girl, Ugoye Nweke for him. Nnaemeka has known this girl since childhood and he smiled, as he thought of this naughty girl, Ugoye Nweke, who used to beat boys in the school. His father was happy with his choice, because Ugoye had a proper Christian upbringing and good character.

The story then takes a leap, as Nnaemeka has come to his native village during the vacation. He asks for forgiveness from his father, as it is impossible for him to marry Ugoye. He discloses to his father, his relationship with Nene Atang, with whom he plans to marry. His father is so shocked by this news that instead of bursting out in anger, as is his nature, he becomes absolutely silent.

Next day the father tries to make him understand the ill effects of marriage outside one’s tribe, calling it devil’s work. Nnaemeka comes back with a sad heart, hoping, that one day his father’s traditional views will change.

Nnaemeka was the first in his village to marry a girl from a different tribe and that is why his father gets concerned even though he himself doesn’t believe in the superstitious beliefs, like other villagers.

All the villagers gathered around Okeke and expressed concern over this strange act of his son, which they considered ‘the beginning of the end’. They were sure, that the boy’s mind was diseased and must be treated by an herbalist. But Okeke did not believe in the superstitions prevalent in the village. The villagers also discussed their local herbalist who was killed by his own medicine.

Despite all this, Nnaemeka and Nene got married. The story moves further six months and they receive a letter from Okeke, in which he shows his annoyance and anger by cutting the wedding picture sent by his son. He declares his rejection of Nene also. This letter hurts them terribly but Nnaemeka is still hopeful, that his father’s basic good nature will change his views one day.

As time passes by, the Ibo friends of Nnaemeka realize, that their married life is very good. They now understand, that for marriage, love and understanding are required and not the same tribe. News of their being one of the happiest couple’s reaches the village also. But no one dares to talk to Okeke about it. He had made great efforts to forget Nnaemeka, although it had been very painful for him.

Then one day Okeke received a letter from Nene. Unwillingly he reads it. Nene informs him, that he has two grandsons and both are now grownup. Every day, they ask for their grandfather and Nene writes, that she doesn’t know, what reply she must give to them. She earnestly requests him to allow them to meet him along with Nnaemeka during the coming vacation and that she herself would not come.

This letter greatly moves Okeke. All these years he had hardened himself but today at the thought of his grandsons, his heart melts. He feels, that he had done great injustice to them and now he must open the door of his house for them, i.e., open his heart for them.

Analysis

Marriage Is a Private Affair by Chinua Achebe tells a story of Nnaemeka. Nnaemeka is having a conversation with his lover, Nene. Nene is pleading Nnaemeka, to inform his father about their plans to marry. However, Nnaemeka is somehow averse because he knows his father won’t accept a woman outside the Ibo community.

Nnaemeka receives a letter from his father, Okeke, notifying him about Ugoye, a devout Christian, whom he has chosen for him to marry. Later, Nnaemeka travels to his village to have a conversation with his father. During this time, Nnaemeka confesses to his father, that he doesn’t want to marry Ugoye. Instead, Nnaemeka tells his father about Nene, a city girl whom he intends to marry. Okeke is appalled by his son’s decision believing it is the work of a devil.

Nevertheless, Okeke is further angered, when he learns, that Nene comes from a different community. He leaves the conversation mid-way and refuses to eat supper. Nnaemeka goes ahead and marries Nene without his father’s consent. Several years later, Okeke is struggling to come to terms with his son’s decision. However, he feels guilty, when Nene sends him a letter informing him about his grandsons’ desire to meet him. The novel indicates the different cultures between rural and city areas. Nene’s beliefs and thoughts are different from those of the Ibo community. The marriage between Nnaemeka and Nene shows that love is essentially beyond customs.

In the story, we have the theme of modernity, tradition, control, conflict, stubbornness, gender roles, independence, change and remorse. The story is narrated in the third person by an unnamed narrator and from the beginning of the story the reader realizes, that Achebe may be exploring the theme of modernity and tradition. Though both Nnaemeka and Nene live in Lagos, a modern city in Nigeria, Nnaemeka is very much aware of the importance of tradition particularly when it comes to his father Okeke, who has arranged for Nnaemeka to marry a girl, from his village despite the fact, that Nnaemeka is due to marry Nene. There is also a sense, that Nnaemeka wishes to control his own life (and destiny) rather than follow the traditions that his father abides to.

Throughout the story Okeke also shows signs of being stubborn. Refusing to even acknowledge Nene either before or after she marries Nnaemeka. So deep is his dislike for Nene that he returns the wedding photo sent to him by Nnaemeka with Nene’s image removed from the photograph. It suggests, that Okeke does not give any recognition to Nene. As far as he is concerned, she does not exist and is not Nnaemeka’s wife. Which would further highlight to the reader just how important tradition is to Okeke.

What is also interesting about the story, is that the women of the village are silent. The only woman in the story who has an independent voice is Nene and she does not live in the village. No equality may exist between male and female within the village. The reality being that life in the village may revolve around traditional gender roles with the male being dominant. Whereas in Lagos Nene as mentioned has her own voice and is not hindered by Nnaemeka. She is allowed to express herself.

The end of the story becomes interesting, when Okeke discovers, that he has two grandchildren, his view of Nnaemeka and Nene’s marriage changes dramatically. No longer is he against the marriage and it is noticeable that Okeke begins to fear that his isolation of Nene has resulted in him also shutting out his grandchildren from his life. It may also be symbolically significant that it is raining when Okeke beings to change his opinion on Nnaemeka and Nene’s marriage. Quite often in literature a writer will use the rain as symbol for change or renewal and this seems to be very much the case in the story. At the end of the story, there is a sense, that not only has Okeke changed his views on Nnaemeka and Nene’s marriage but he may also have changed as a person.